Harry Potter JOKES

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Prof. Tarma Amelia Black
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Harry Potter JOKES

Postby Prof. Tarma Amelia Black » Wed Sep 09, 2015 3:05 am

Siriusly, we all know there are galleons of Harry Potter jokes out in the Muggle world. How could it be that we are known? They don't even believe in magic!

Even so, some of those jokes are funny. Some are so un-funny they are groanworthy. Have you encountered any? Post them in here! Limit 5 jokes per post. If it is a graphic, please limit size to 900 pixels total. Make sure your posts are HOL appropriate.

*House jokes may ONLY be posted by persons of that House.
*NO House-bashing allowed (even if they are funny) (even if you are a member of that House).

Q: Where do you find Dumbledore's Army?
A: Up his Sleevy.

Q: Did you hear about the witch who won the lottery?
A: Yeah, she went completely Knuts!

Q: How many wizards does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None -- wizards don't use electricity!

Q: How many centaurs does it take to light up a single wand?
A: Two. One to say the spell and the other to keep remarking how bright the wand is tonight.

I'm a Hufflepuff. As such, I submit this joke:

Q: What kind of cereal do they serve at Hogwarts?
A: Hufflepuffs
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*Siggy and Avatar from The Princess Bride*
"You have the inborn natural right to remain silent. Don't think about it, don't talk about it, shuush ....STILL."~Xaris

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Joey Stark
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Re: Harry Potter JOKES

Postby Joey Stark » Wed Sep 09, 2015 1:28 pm

Q: Why did Barty Crouch Jr. stop drinking?
A: It was making him Moody

Q: Why did Snape stand in the middle of the road?
A: So you'll never know which side he's on

As a Ravenclaw:

Q: What do you get when you cross a Ravenclaw with the infirmary?
A: Ill-literacy
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Credit to Maxim! ^

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Prof. Tarma Amelia Black
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Re: Harry Potter JOKES

Postby Prof. Tarma Amelia Black » Tue Sep 29, 2015 4:40 am

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(I didn't make this - but I did laugh ...)
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*Siggy and Avatar from The Princess Bride*
"You have the inborn natural right to remain silent. Don't think about it, don't talk about it, shuush ....STILL."~Xaris

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February Fortescue
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Re: Harry Potter JOKES

Postby February Fortescue » Mon Nov 16, 2015 2:28 am

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av and sig by talented Prof. Fumei Spookie

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Arianna Stonewater
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Re: Harry Potter JOKES

Postby Arianna Stonewater » Mon May 02, 2016 10:29 pm

Q: On a scale of 1 to 10, how obsessed with Harry Potter are we?
A: About 9 3/4

Q: Why does Voldemort only use Twitter and not Facebook?
A: Cause he only has followers, not friends

Q: Why did Barty Crouch Jr. quit drinking?
A: Because it was making him Moody.

Harry Potter Puns: They can Slytherin to any conversation!


I didn't make this, but its one of my favorites:
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February Fortescue
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Re: Harry Potter JOKES

Postby February Fortescue » Mon May 09, 2016 1:57 pm

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av and sig by talented Prof. Fumei Spookie

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Maxwell Shadow
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Re: Harry Potter JOKES

Postby Maxwell Shadow » Fri Sep 09, 2016 9:50 pm

This made me giggle just a tad...

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Slytherin forever
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Bull J. Johnson
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Re: Harry Potter JOKES

Postby Bull J. Johnson » Tue Jan 31, 2017 1:58 am

Dad to Mom: So you know what the plan is?

Mom to Dad: Yes, I know what the plan is. *starts saying plan*

Me (outloud): "And I'll be upstairs in my room making no noise and pretending I don't exist."


(Later)

*Me watching tv and dad walking into living room*

Dad to Me: I thought you said something about going upstairs.

*Me then rolling my eyes because I wonder how he can't remember that what I said was a line said by Harry Potter* LOL


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